Monday, March 21, 2011

My "Kiss From God"

If you have read the book Captivating: Unveiling the Mystery of a Woman's Soul by John and Stasi Eldredge, then you are probably already familiar with the concept of a "kiss from God". Though slightly cheesy-sounding, I loved the concept of receiving a display of a personal relationship with my Father. In the book, Stasi spoke of praying for a sign of His affection, and moments later she stumbled upon thousands of bright starfish while walking on the beach. She then grew to have a special fondness for starfish, and it became a symbol of God's unique love for her. I read this with hunger, wanting to have for myself a sort of physical, daily reminder that God loves me and knows me intimately. I began to pray that He would reveal to me a symbol of His love for me, and I felt assured that when the moment was right, He would.

Three summers ago, I was going for a walk outside of Loussac Library, around the fountains and through trees and patches of overgrown weeds. It was raining and the ground was absolutely covered with mud- and the weather matched my mood. I was struggling with my purity and utterly crying out that God would assure me that I was clean and forgiven and beautiful. I was praying for clean hands and a pure heart (yes, just like the worship song...) and desperately hoping that God would show me that I could have those very things. I also asked (well, begged) that at this time He would bestow on me His kiss, so that I could see and know and taste His salvation and love for me. As I trudged along through the muddy lawn, splashing in puddles of brown water and becoming as filthy outside as I was trying not to feel inside, I looked down and felt the Spirit of God tell me, "Look, my darling, here it is! Here is My proof to you that I love you! This is exactly what I see when I look at you!" There, growing out of the flooded and dirty ground, was a perfectly white and perfectly pure little daisy. There was my kiss from God- my very own symbol of how much He delights in me, and a reminder that Christ's blood washed me clean and I am now pure. Among the flooded and dirty world, I shine like a pure white flower, an image of my Divine Creator; and among all of my dirt and sin, my salvation triumphs and Christ shines through.

Needless to say, I became OBSESSED with daisies. Not even a week later, I bought a purity ring that is a circle of silver daisies around my finger. It is one of my most prized possessions, and even when I get married, I will continue to wear it on another finger, as a representation of my commitment to purity and to daily accepting God's grace. The flower itself is commonly known to represent purity, innocence, loyal love, beauty, patience and simplicity- all character traits that I value in my Lord and that I aim to reflect. Everything I own pretty much has daisies on it now, and I love it. How blessed I am to have a God who takes the time to delight in me and give me the desires of my heart- who whispers to me and calls to me and pursues and romances me! ^.^

1 comment:

  1. Your heart is so precious and beautiful, darling Jade! He loves you so passionately and relentlessly, and is wooing you always. You are his perfect and pure Bride, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish... You are holy and blameless in his sight. Know that, and own that!

    Also, I am proud to be the first to post a comment on your bloggy blog...Just sayin'